Father’s Day jokes

Dad always has some pearlers that are just NOT funny! Give him a taste of his own medicine this Father’s day, or any day really! These jokes might load him up on ammunition for the future, so be warned!

Dad jokes

Q. Does a dad ALWAYS snore?
A. No, only when he is asleep.

Q. What does a dad say when asked to put the kettle on?
A. Sorry, I don’t think it will fit.

Q. What does a dad say when you ask to leave the table?
A. Where do you want to leave it?

Q. What did Dad do after offering a hand with your homework?
A. Started clapping.

Q. When asked to put the cat out at night, what was Dad’s response?
A. “I did not know it was on fire!”

Q. The waiter asks your dad how he would you like his steak, what is his response?
A. On a plate, please.

Q. You ask your Dad what is on the TV, what is his answer?
A. Dust.

Q. What did Dad’s tie say to his neck?
A. Do you mind if I hang around?

Q. What did Dad say about the deer head mounted on the cabin wall?
A. He must have been going pretty fast when he hit the wall!

Q. When it’s raining Dad will ask: So kids, no one is afraid of snakes are they?
A. No? Well good because I am turning on the windscreen vipers.

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